Whatever...Whenever!

When our kids were young, people often asked my husband, John,  if he knew about Dick Hoyt.  "Of course," he'd reply, sheepishly. "That's the guy who makes me feel like a horrible father." I know he was only half-joking.

For nearly 40 years, devoted dad Dick Hoyt ran marathons and triathlons with his disabled son Rick.  Photos of them competing together filled the internet, inspiring countless people to get off the couch -- and suggesting to some (like my husband) that they weren't doing enough to support their special needs kids. 

But we all can't be heroes, or can we?

Team Hoyt was clearly incredible. Over the years, the father/son duo completed the Boston Marathon 32 times and logged more than 1,000 endurance races together, including 257 triathlons. I can't begin to fathom the training and exhaustion Dick and Rick endured. But the rewards were obviously tremendous. “When my dad and I are out there on a run, a special bond forms between us,” Rick Hoyt told The New York Times in 2009 with the help of his computer voice program. “And it feels like there is nothing Dad and I cannot do.”  

Dick Hoyt didn't see himself as a hero. He's even quoted as saying, "I'm just a father. All I did was tie on a pair of running shoes and push my son in a wheelchair." From my perspective, Team Hoyt was more than heroic, but not in the ways you might suspect. I believe their lasting gift to all of us is really just a simple reminder: 

Do whatever you can whenever you can.

Even dads who don't run marathons can support their kids in mighty ways.  Pick something fun to enjoy with your child, and do it, whenever possible. Dance. Sing. Spend time in nature. Cheer on your favorite sports teams. Read together. Watch a movie. Fly a kite.

And make time to take care of yourself, too.

Because running has become a part of his regular routine, John is now inspired by Dick Hoyt instead of annoyed. Working with the amazing Michael Didonato (check out his incredible story HERE), John and Andrew acquired their brand new Hoyt Running Chair last month and will soon head to New York City for their first road race in Central Park. A short run on a long journey -- and pretty exciting for all. 

Like the Hoyts, my husband and son are eager to have fun together and make memories. It's their "whatever, whenever." And just thinking about it makes them smile.

Hopefully, you've found something similar to make life more joyful, satisfying, and fun as a parent of someone with complex needs. Or perhaps you'll find it soon. Dick Hoyt would be delighted by that, because he wasn't better than us. He was just one of us -- doing extraordinary things. Just like we all can.  Whatever...whenever!

R.I.P. Dick and Rick. And Happy Father's Day.

Note:  Team Burbank's new Hoyt Running Chair will soon be available on loan to others in Connecticut through the Achilles International organization.  For information and future updates about this exciting opportunity, follow us on social media through the links below.